Today my sister shared her Open Diary page with me. I was nervous about reading it. I know I've ticked her off in the past, and vise versa. It's part of being sisters. I didn't want to come across an angry rant about me and end up with hurt feelings. But, after some hesitation, I followed the link. There was only a comment or two that hurt me in some way. Some amused me, and others just confused me. Lately, when I get new information or dig through a forgotten memory, I feel nauseous. Normally when I'm stressed I get headaches, but every now and then it is manifested in other physical ways. So I guess how I'm feeling now is nauseous. For some reason that's my only response at this point.
As I was reading Abby's blog, I was surprised by how many of her feelings I could relate with. I've never forgotten that she was abused in many ways as well, but I've never been certain how it's affected her - just that it had. But some of her posts could have been written by me. The feelings were that similar. I feel closer to her in a way.
Anyway, this is leading into a post about family, and I don't feel like dealing with all of that tonight!
In other news, Thursday is my 25th birthday. I'm taking the day off work (paid, thank you very much) to relax I guess. I wish I had more friends and family around here, but that's how it goes. Anyone want to take me out for drinks and an early dinner?? :-)
Oh, in case you were curious, I would choose teleportation. Its just so darn convenient!
I was always nervous about adding my sister on myspace and then facebook, for those exact reasons. I never want to be someone's fool, or the butt of the joke.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'd never think of something as smart as teleportation. I'd just think of like having extra arms, or flying or some other such nonsense... you always were a bright girl. I like that about you, very much. That and watching Big Love.
Having been raised by a survivor of child molestation I understand some of the things you're going through, as much as someone who's never been through it can.
God blesses those who use their experience to help heal others. And you will be blessed mightly. (Sry I got so wordy on a post)
Haha, Flying was my second choice. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear that your mom went through that - my heart goes out to her. It gives me hope to see that she could still successfully raise a wonderful woman though.
Thank you so much for your support. :-)
It does suck. And there is great hope, my aunt also went through molestation, and her story is much worse than my moms. She ended up having a child, being committed to a mental institution they had her found an unfit mother, and she endured electro shock therapy. But she's an amazing artist. And has little to no regrets.
ReplyDeleteAnd you had my support before I knew, and you'll always have it. I have the biggest wishes and constant prayers for you and Aaron.
You all keep my hopes of decent men alive. :)
I'm glad Abby shared her OD with you. She still has a lot of hurt inside her.
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