When you log on to Facebook and click to update your status, it says "What's on your mind?" Often, what's on my mind is a dream I had, or my support group, or the anxiety I'm feeling. So I share that. I suffered in silence for 17 years of my life. Why I should I continue to do so because it might make someone uncomfortable?
I'm sure I've lost some "Facebook friends" because of this, but that's fine with me. It's too difficult for many survivors to speak out about their pain. I, for whatever reason, don't feel like I have anything to lose. If someone chooses not too understand or not to be supportive, then they are missing a big part of who I am. A part I refuse to hide.
To be clear, I don't suffer all the time. I have a great life, but I'm still working through some things and facing some demons. That's my reality, not a sob story.
I still feel like our society expects victims of any kind of trauma to just pack it all up in a neat little box, throw away the key and move on with their lives. And perhaps many of us sense that more than it exists, and therefore do that very thing. Then society in turn learns that that is how it works. I don't know. It's a difficult thing to measure. But there needs to be some recognition that that isn't how it works. There is healing that needs to happen, and that takes some time and support. I read a study recently that discussed the importance of social bonds when recovering from trauma. If you want to try to read it (its very clinical), follow this link.
Rachel
i LOVE this post, and identify a lot with it lately!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Beth! This was one of those posts that I was second guessing. You made me feel much better about it. :-)
ReplyDeletei love this. and i can by all means as you know relate. By you speaking out loud it has helped others do the same including myself. Thank You.
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